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I want to be trained is the cry of the sub ...
11/15/2011 2:12 pm Last Read: |
As is the usual with conversations of this type when it comes down to it 99% of the subs who have suggested such a path to me have backed out. As recently as today I had one such conversation. I knew very little about her so prepared some simple exploratory questions and sent 3/4 days ago. The conversation lasted about 20 seconds, 'Sorry looking for something else' which generally means 'erm, didnt expect that and now i'll go and find a fuck buddy' Hey, I am not putting them down, but the depth that is required for training I believe is somewhat misunderstood. I'll admit I am not one for doing training, having only done it to completion once (very mentally and physically exhausting) but even spending 10 minutes doing some searching on the Internet does detail the basic level required. Mys_ti_cal |
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11/15/2011 3:14 pm |
What does the "training process" look like to you? Maybe the exploratory questions led her to believe you wanted different things. I am always a little baffled when poeple say they want to be trained, as well as when dominants talk about training s types. I don't really get what "training" is. I mean, I serve R, and He has never trained me. I just do it. And with time I learn to do what I do naturally, even better. I learn to customize things to fit Him, but that isn't training, it is the natural process and growth of a relationship.
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 11/15/2011 4:05 pm |
The 'training process' for me is specific to the sub, however the questions cover what I consider some basic issues i) Finance - ie. The sub can afford their own stuff, so have a job. ii) Sex - Training should not be their primary source of sexual activity iii) Experience - If they want training with no experience it really is non starter iv) State of health - Issues etc v) Timescales - My expectations of meeting - I usually outline something very basic, so once a week and consider the reaction. There are other questions but for me that broadly gets a picture of the sub in question and helps me determine if a yes/no and show them this is not a simple talk and fuck game. I am sure people will say you should ask this/that etc, however like my profile removes most of the rubbish. Mys_ti_cal
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11/15/2011 4:41 pm |
The 'training process' for me is specific to the sub, however the questions cover what I consider some basic issues i) Finance - ie. The sub can afford their own stuff, so have a job. ii) Sex - Training should not be their primary source of sexual activity iii) Experience - If they want training with no experience it really is non starter iv) State of health - Issues etc v) Timescales - My expectations of meeting - I usually outline something very basic, so once a week and consider the reaction. There are other questions but for me that broadly gets a picture of the sub in question and helps me determine if a yes/no and show them this is not a simple talk and fuck game. I am sure people will say you should ask this/that etc, however like my profile removes most of the rubbish. Mys_ti_cal I mean isn't training teaching one how to do something? I'm afraid I am like Voodoo Princess....I never understood what 'training' is all about...train to do what? If you are submissive you are submissive... what do you 'train'? For newcomers and not so newcomers. Arm yourself with knowledge
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11/15/2011 6:50 pm |
It sounds like it could come off very cold and matter of factual. Perhaps that is the problem. If a person I was JUST getting to know wanted to know my finances and sexual activity I would cry off. While those things may be valid within D/s, you are not a D/s couple yet. Just my thoughts. But while some women say they want training, they usually mean they want to be trained by a warm and loving dom/me that they feel a connection with. I don't have to understand the purpose to know that much. Granted, I am not seeing your actual interactions either. Maybe the delivery is not so abrupt and form like when you use it directly. But those are just my observations. Best of luck to you however you go about it. 
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