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Old School Stealth-Perv  


2/12/2007 11:01 am

Last Read:
2/14/2007 11:14 pm

I've been chewed over the weekend. Considerably chewed in rather obvious places. Amusing certainly, but not something I need to be walking about with in public.

Now, I took some lessons in smutty from a few friends over the years, and these sistahs knew their way around a hickey and all sorts of other ways of concealing obvious marks of debauch.

So I broke out the old toothpaste and a hot pack and got to work. You can laugh...but it works. I have no idea why, probably peppermint oil in toothpaste, or menthol or some damn thing. Once of these days I'll break it down. But slather some toothpaste over a hickey or bruise, soak a cloth in water as hot as you can stand, and place on top of the toothpaste and give it about ten minutes. Bruising significantly diminshed. No, I'm not just telling you this to see if you're dumb enough to try it. It actually works.

I wonder if any of the toothpaste companies know of their product's ability to hide considerable amounts of bruising through play or enjoyment. Honestly, I imagine it would probably become quite the sales angle.
BostonBoi
15328 posts

2/12/2007 3:34 pm

Hmmm...I am not sure why the toothpaste works. The hot pack I can see...the heat and pressure will help disperse the blood in the bruising...but toothpaste? That's news to me. Useful news too since I'm so fucking pale that bruises can be spotted on my white canvas from 100 meters.

"In a time of universal deceit - telling the truth is a revolutionary act."
---George Orwell


OyaD replies on 2/12/2007 4:46 pm:
Hotpacks actually make it worse; this is why broken capillaries and varicose veins are made worse by very hot baths or showers. The additive in toothpaste seems to shrink the blood vessels or summat.

And hey, I thought the main part of your allure was just how well those bruises show up!

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