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Radio Show
7/14/2008 9:28 pm |
I'm writing a piece for a local radio show. It's a 2-min. public commentary deal on a local NPR affiliate. This is a first draft--I've been letting it mellow for a few days. I'm not 100% happy with it. What do y'all think? Any of y'all. Or all of y'all. (I just like saying "y'all", basically...) Any reactions are welcome. It's called "Done with Suffering." A manager at the company where I work, a man in his sixties, recently lost his mother in law. I overheard him taking a condolence call in the officeit was her time to go; she lived a long life. At one point he replied to the caller, At least shes not suffering. Not suffering. What would it be like to not suffer? Dont get me wrong. Ive lived a rather charmed life so farroof over my head, plenty to eat, a job that pays the bills. Im blessed with enough free time and energy to struggle with the moral, emotional and spiritual anxieties that my life presents. On the cusp of turning 40, Im of a generation burdened with the expectation of constant happiness, and devastated by its elusiveness. But that doesnt mean Ive really suffered. Not like an old woman, frail and in pain, spending her last days in a hospital bed. Not really. Not yet. But stilla life without suffering? I think about that phrase, and I realize that at some deep level, I want to suffer. I crave it. Suffering is essential to life. Because suffering holds the promise of joy. If we cannot suffer, we cannot feel; and if we cannot feel, we cannot feel joy, and awe, and XXXXX. (Need to finish sentence) If you are a creature that cannot suffer, then you are in some sense cut off from your essential humanity. To be human is to suffer, and to suffer is to be human. I may feel differently when my time in that hospital bed comes. But I hope not. |
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7/14/2008 10:07 pm |
Hello Howard. It has been a long time since I blogged and read blogs. I miss your writing and will have to go back and read some. I happen to be one who listens to NPR every day. A friend of mine says it is too liberal. Well, in that case, it is right up my alley, so I congratulate you on getting to write a piece for them. I rather like what you have written too. You are right that the depths of suffering are a measuring tool in a sense, because the more depth, the more contrast to enlighten the heights of our joys. Without the challenge, with no suffering, there is no lesson to be learned........no growth so to speak. Each suffering expands us and adds to our wealth of wisdom from learning our lessons. You are right. If we do not feel, we can not feel joy and the awe of love. (My opinion) One thing I have learned over time through my own travails is this......If one goes through it many times, the fear of facing the mountain slides away. One may have to face the seemingly insurmountable mountain again and again knowing the pain of climbing it, but one through intimate knowledge of it in time loses the fear of the suffering and pain, because one has exprienced the joy on the other side and knows the pain is oh oh so worth the risk of climbing and falling many times over before one finally surmounts it. I wish you well in your endeavors. Peace, Light, Love
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7/15/2008 10:52 pm |
Cheryl, Thank you for your response. I love that line, "If one goes through it many times, the fear of facing the mountain slides away." Do you mind if I paraphrase that, and shoehorn it into my piece as I revise? I appreciate how you take thoughts and expand on them, not only in this case but generally. Thanks for your blogs.
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7/15/2008 10:53 pm |
In contrast to your kiss up groupies i am going to give you my right off straight answer... HOW DARE YOU!!!??? Do you, do i, not know joy unless we have "SUFFRED"!!? I KNEW JOY! I KNEW PURE WONDER! I KNEW LIFE! HAPPINESS, BEAUTY, DELIGHT!!! BEFORE I EVER REALLY SUFFRED! And my suffering has not made me feel any more alive then i ever was, I did not feel dead before I knew what suffering was, nor did it make me feel joy again or feel joy as if it was something new to me and i had to be ripped apart to feel good once more. BULL SHIT! HAVING TO HAVE PAIN TO FEEL ALIVE! And craving to suffer is just stupid!! STUPID!!! OPEN YOUR SELFISH DAMMED EYES AND SEE YOUR WIFE BY YOUR SIDE!! And realize you do not have to hurt her or yourself to feel the joy that she is STILL by your side after all the shit you have put her through. THEN LOOK AT ME!! And figure out you do not have to have such suffering as what my life has dealt me, (suffering that you have nothing to do with) and then step back and KNOW NOTHING you did to me is a drop in the bucket to wakening up with my 10 week old son dead by my shoulder. That i had a daughter never born because of being formed with no brain ... losing my first fianc
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7/16/2008 12:42 am |
Beauty, As I said in our phone conversation, thank you for your honesty, as difficult as it is to hear. I would ask that, if you have a reaction to or problem with something someone else has posted here, please address it directly and respectfully to that person. Please refrain from name-calling. Thanks.
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7/16/2008 5:44 pm |
Cheryl, Thank you for your response. I love that line, "If one goes through it many times, the fear of facing the mountain slides away." Do you mind if I paraphrase that, and shoehorn it into my piece as I revise? I appreciate how you take thoughts and expand on them, not only in this case but generally. Thanks for your blogs. Peace, Light, Love
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7/16/2008 7:50 pm |
In contrast to your kiss up groupies i am going to give you my right off straight answer... HOW DARE YOU!!!??? Do you, do i, not know joy unless we have "SUFFRED"!!? I KNEW JOY! I KNEW PURE WONDER! I KNEW LIFE! HAPPINESS, BEAUTY, DELIGHT!!! BEFORE I EVER REALLY SUFFRED! And my suffering has not made me feel any more alive then i ever was, I did not feel dead before I knew what suffering was, nor did it make me feel joy again or feel joy as if it was something new to me and i had to be ripped apart to feel good once more. BULL SHIT! HAVING TO HAVE PAIN TO FEEL ALIVE! And craving to suffer is just stupid!! STUPID!!! OPEN YOUR SELFISH DAMMED EYES AND SEE YOUR WIFE BY YOUR SIDE!! And realize you do not have to hurt her or yourself to feel the joy that she is STILL by your side after all the shit you have put her through. THEN LOOK AT ME!! And figure out you do not have to have such suffering as what my life has dealt me, (suffering that you have nothing to do with) and then step back and KNOW NOTHING you did to me is a drop in the bucket to wakening up with my 10 week old son dead by my shoulder. That i had a daughter never born because of being formed with no brain ... losing my first fianc You have a few truths in your post like this one. "YOU DO NOT NEED TO SUFFER TO KNOW JOY!!!" It is true. One does not need to suffer to know joy. It is also true that one has greater appreciation for blessings when one has a history of pain to measure by. Both are true. One may have joy in one's life without ever having pain and one may have even greater joy one perceives when one has greater contrast between that joy and past knowledge of pain. Surely, as intelligent as you are, having pain in your past, you must know this. Just as a person who has had every single thing given easily to them in their past and had no challenges can enjoy the things they acquire and the love they perceive with joy in their hearts, so the person who has had to climb mountains, has been given very little in life and has had suffering appreciates that which is given and the love they perceive with greater joy and appreciation because they know more keenly the value of it. The joy has greater height because of relativity. Relativity applies to everything.....even joy. All things in life are relative to everything else. Just as speed is relative to you as you stand still looking at a passing car and as you see one passing you slowly on the highway while you speed down the highway. The first looks like it passes very fast and the other looks like it is passing you slowly even though they both can be moving at the exact same speed on the speedometer. Just as the starving man appreciates the cafeteria roll and carton of milk greatly, while the food conniseur would think it cardboard, so the child who knows joy at playing tag at age 8 knows greater joy at playing tag at age 10 once he receives prosthetic limbs to finally run, like he has watched the other children do for two years after his accident at age 8. Each knows joy. One values it more and has greater joy. This one that you wrote is encased so lovingly from a loving, human being and raised my eyebrows as an example of how you show your love.... "YOU SUFFER!? CRAP!! YOU COULDN'T! You do not have the maturity to SUFFER! Nor can you recognize you do not want to or need to suffer! What you do is hurt and harm those close to you so you feel badly about your actions and can think you suffer, and can feel better as we forgive you over and over. Anyone with any idea of reality and a mature look at the world knows suffering is NOT necessary to understanding, appreciating, feeling and spreading joy! NO ONE HAS TO SUFFER TO BE HUMAN AND FEEL HUMAN FEELINGS" What one "can" do is not the same as what one does. You have heard the saying "Never say Never." That is because absolutes are not given. One can possibly do something later that one does not do now. There is only one absolute, and that is love. There is either love or lack of it in our choices we make and actions we take. You say above that it takes maturity to know suffering is not necessary for happiness, but it does not take any maturity at all. Babies are not mature, yet they know suffering is not necessary for perception of joy, since they perceive it so easily relative to themselves, having very few experiences (history) mounted up in their lives to relate to, and yet, even though they have very little history, still they know hunger and pain, albeit some of them know very short bouts of it, and they cry in need, although some may cry only a little, so they too have some relativity to relate to and appreciate at higher level the bottle that comes to them late after much hunger more than the bottle that comes to them early before they have any hunger. There is this quote from you....."YOU SUFFER!? CRAP!! YOU COULDN'T! You do not have the maturity to SUFFER!" Again, it does not take maturity to suffer. If it were so, then no baby in the world would suffer at all, not having the maturity to feel it or know it. As perceptive as you are by now, you must know this well. As mature as you are by now, surely you know a wise person does not tell another person what they can and can not feel, nor what they do or do not feel, unless they tell you themselves, or am I to understand that you allow others in your life to tell you what you can and can not feel or do feel, as that is the experience you choose for yourself in your life? Everything is relative. It could be true for you that you choose that for yourself. If so, and it is your vibrational level path you choose, it is only true for you and not for any other person except those that feel as you do, are on the same vibrational level, and believe they should tell others how to feel, as well as let others tell them how to feel. If so, you will be vibrationally drawn to those type of people and they to you, and you will have that in your life as your choice of life lesson/experience/path to learn from. Those who evolve vibrationally will eventually drift away and be drawn to others of their vibrational frequency as they choose a different path to learn from. Finally, you have this to say about the piece he is writing..... My input is do not put this on the air it is crap from a selfish immature ideal... i love you, Yours Everyone is entitled to their opinion and feelings. You yours. Me mine. Him his, and others theirs. You choose to show what you think is love in your way imbued with your intentions. Only the intentions imbued deterimine if it is love. I say this......It is only immature to you and those who feel like you. It is not immature to me or those who feel like me. Again, everything is relative. The real immaturity is feeling that everything is relative to one's self. Surely you know this, as you know children, being as immature as they are psychologically, they perceive everything and react to everything as it relates to themselves. It can be found in any child development book. It is a phase they go through and persist in through half of their teenage years until they obtain the ability to perceive logic and abstract thought. The lack of abstract thought is why one usually can not teach them algebra until they hit about 11 or 12 years of age. They develop and grow. It persists until they firmly grasp abstract thought and grow in it's wisdom as they grow in their teenage years and beyond. However, not to be absolute, it is also true that many out there never grow far in their abstract thought and continue through their whole lives at the same vibrational level reacting as if everything is relative to themselves. It is also true that some children, a few, are geniuses. It is not what you see from inside the sphere you inhabit, but what you see from outside of it from all perspective points, as well as inside it in any direction you look, that gives you fuller understanding. The ideal is not the immature ideal of a selfish person. It is the ideal of one seeking, curious, wanting to learn and active in their choice to learn, rather than stagnant and boxed in to a certain way. It is not a selfish ideal whether it be from a perspective you like, or a perspective you do not like. Being proactive in learning no matter the path is not wrong. It is simply different. Being boxed in is even a learning path, albeit one that will stagnate one over time and not allow future growth. Understand that others learn different lessons then you right now, even though, in the growing, we all will learn all lessons if one is to believe we are immortal souls. Peace, Light, Love
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7/16/2008 8:02 pm |
Oh, and by the way Howard, since I have been a fan of NPR for a long time, would you mind telling me when it will be broadcast so I can listen to it? Thanks. Peace, Light, Love
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7/18/2008 2:52 pm |
n2, Thanks for your kind words. For you and for naughtylass-- The program is not run nationally on NPR; it's just on the Santa Cruz member station, KUSP. But they do have a live stream over their website (which is kusp dot org). I don't have it finished and sent into them (let alone recorded and scheduled to air). I'll let you know when I do. I've got another piece, more political, sort of brewing inside, so I may send them more than one. But on their website they do have the text of some of the broadcasts archived, and there are a few of my pieces there that aired in March, November and December of 2001. If you're interested in looking them up, you can go to the website; look to the right and click "Find Shows and Other Info"; scroll down to First Person Singular; then click on "The First Person Singular Archive." Click on the months I mentioned, and there you have it. I appreciate your guys' support.
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7/20/2008 9:16 pm |
Cheryl, Thank you for seeing the love in Beauty's words. She and I are working our way towards more effective ways of communicating with each other, and my first reactions (to anything, not just to her) are not always very generous or understanding. It is easy for me to get angry and frustrated--it is only later, if at all, that I can follow up those reactions with more positive ones. I appreciate your good example. Thank you.
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