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jenny14 75T  
90121 posts
4/28/2016 7:29 pm

Raven

A very nice analogy - yes, many complain here that so many so-called subs are just "topping from the bottom" solely for their pleasure!


A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. George Bernard Shaw

Jenny


Dreamcatcher__ 87M
7019 posts
4/28/2016 7:45 pm

I wandered into this community hoping I could find something that resembled the experiences I had living for over a decade in Japan and Korea. There was some of what you describe, but without the cultural context there's really no comparison.

I used to attend gatherings at Kisaeng or Geisha houses. The service was, and is, an art form. Even in the cabarets, clubs and stand bars the tradition was maintained. After the clubs closed for the evening, my favorite hostesses would occasionally take me to transvestite establishments where they could then enjoy the kind of attention they had been trained to provide. It took me a while to get used to that, but I had to admit that the imitation was equal to or better than the real thing.

As much as I had hoped to recreate some semblance of that experience in my D/s relationships here, the traditional cultural acceptance of domination and submission is so different there's virtually no chance to succeed. Just finding the right submissive to train is a challenge. Get it wrong and you can waste valuable months, even years.


likesmatureones 55M

4/29/2016 4:53 am

well honestly the problem with old feudal japan is one could never rise above their station. You bowed because you'd be killed if your didn't If you stepped out of your station you would be beheaded. People had no choice or free will

So technically it paints a pretty picture of what an ideal bdsm society should be..respect and honor for all. In reality the people in charge were a bunch of selfish assholes. Sure the servant males didn't touch the women.. but you know the ruler slept with every woman in the palace and treated them literally as whores.

What you probably should equate bdsm to is modern japan...where there is still honor and respect for everyone ( homosexuality for example is no biggie ..alot of japan's greatest samurai had male lovers..so there is no sticker shock if someone in the family comes out as gay).

The people have a choice. They chose to study hard/get educated/respect their parents. They take pride in their work and get enjoyment from serving others.

You should have to demand servitude from someone...they should get pleasure from it. If you have to beat it out of someone, then perhaps your playing with the wrong people



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