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True story! True story. Happened last evening and a little disjointed and i have not edited it at all. So all apologies if it is hard to read, but wanted to get it to type. Here is the ad wording used on the CL ad: "Worthless bitch wanted. The last one proved her worth and is now having to play with herself because it did not get along with others. Don't expect much and there will be no disappointment." So set up a date with a woman off of that ad on cl. got a reply and played it down. no pic or description and set up a meet. I thought no photo, no description and no phone calls would be adventuresome. it was to be at a easy to get to applebees. set it up this way as a bit of an adventure. told her to come into the restaurant and we would do a little role play and i would pick her up. easy stuff. so I get there and upon arrival i follow a girl into the parking lot and she gives me a look, so i think she might be the one, remember no pictures or descriptions have been given. go the to the bar and sit at where i am supposed to sit, back to the door at the end of the usual applebees bar setup. girl that arrived was sitting a few stools to my left and although she gave me a couple of more looks i could tell that this was not the player i was looking for. she was very familiar with all the staff and was just in to have one glass of wine before going home. okay, no big. at the appointed time another girl comes and and takes up a spot 5 stools to my right and i get a look. i watch some sports and listen to her patter with the bartender and figure this is the one. she gets a drink menu orders a drink and some appetizers and i begin to chat her up a bit. after 10 minutes or so I ask if i can slide over and sit next to her. i am thinking this is good. nice tits, so-so body, but doable and a great attitude. we talk for 30 minutes or so and i get a text that asks me if i was there. this girl i was talking to had put her phone down a few minutes before this and i had my phone on silent, so again I think this is her. another 5-7 minutes go by and get another text, now this time this girl had not picked up her phone in a while and after a couple of more text messages i realize this is not the girl. too bad because she was cool, easy to talk to and not to hard on the eyes. the text messages i was getting was to say she was late, had to get power steering fluid, etc... now i am sure this is the wrong girl sitting to my right. after a few more minutes i ask her if she would like to hear a funny story and tell her of the meet and how i thought it was her, she has already told me she was dating a man, for about a month, she had always dated jerks and this guy was different, her only concern and a good one was that he was married. anyway she finds the story very funny. she is laughing her ass off and across the bar was a mother sitting, in her fifties and mom age appropriate as well. i told her that maybe i should try to pick them up and do both of them, had sisters before, and she laughed even harder. kept getting messages that my girl was later and later, told her i would wait but didnt care for the late arrival, oh well. every time a woman would come in the door i figured it was her, but still not the chick i was waiting for. i even made a joke when a tall guy came in that this might be my date, more laughs from this girl to my right. i tell the girl i am sitting with that i should probably scoot down one seat to not give this girl the wrong impression that i am alone and waiting for her. so she arrives, doesnt come to the bar like i told her and sends me a text that she cant find me, but i am sitting at my appointed spot just like i said. she then calls and sees me answer the phone and comes over and sits down. the girl i had been talking to pays her tab and vanishes with 30 seconds. damn. my "date" orders a shot of tequila and a beer. kind of a strong start for the evening, but wtf, who cares. i think i should have know she was crazy not long after starting a conversation with her. she said she like my style and the way i texted and told me she could tell a lot about how one texted. what it tells me is that people can read, write and hit a button. she talks kind of crazy, but i give her a little leash to see where it goes. she orders another round just like the first, a shot and a beer. again, doubling down on a strong start, i think hmmmm. she tells me of being stalked by a guy that is in a new car every day and he has a glow around him, never approaches but watches from afar, "glowing" (that's right glowing) always in a new car. reality is setting in for me at least and i am not sure what to think, but allow some more leash. i ask her when this is happening and she tells me "oh not for a long time now a few years or so" again i think wtf is the telling me a story like this for. I get really dark in the summer if i am in the sun and she tells me i have a nice color and have to be indian (native), but I am not , I do have maybe a 32nd, but this is not documented. then she tells me of her dad and his reluctance to share family data with her, dates of birth of relatives, dates of deaths and so on.... a pattern is emerging, but not sending up too many red flags, but just enough to be wary. a little more crazy talk, but I am hungry and want to eat, so i pay the tab and we go get in the car and head to an Outback steak house. it is the friday evening before the fourth of July and I knew it would be easy to get in even thought i almost always insist on sitting at the bar. so we take up a spot on the bar I order a beer and thank God she orders water. i am thinking maybe the brakes will be applied to the crazy talk. there is a Canadian football game on the main screen there and i comment that it is weird to have a football game on at this time. now she starts getting kind of assertive with her crazy talk. what do i mean about the football game and i explain that it is awful weird to be watching live football in July. she apparently does not understand the seasons of sports and how they usually don't over lap, but it is really not sinking in. she wants to change the channel and i explain that this is a bar and for the most part sports will be on the tv as a rule. i am not sure what she was wanting to change the channel to, my thought was oprah or whatever. i explain that I don't like to bother people and would not want them to change it because it was pleasant to watch the game it was the Alouettes vs Stampeders. I dont know shit about the CFL, but it was nice to see some football action. the Nationals and the Giants were playing a game and it was on the smaller sets around the bar, so good stuff, baseball and football, at least i had that going for me. this girl is now commenting on everything going on in this restaurant. first it was a guy with a pony tail. she hides her face and says he looks familiar, i told her i didnt know anybody and didnt care to know anybody in this restaurant and just wanted to have low stress meal with a beer while watching a little sports and didnt care about anything else. she goes on about other patrons, staff and every thing else going on. she comments on a waitress and says she is cute, which she also did at applebees. at applebees she comments on a girls ass which was good by the way and i figured she might be bi, but she says she is not that she can appreciate a pretty girl without being bi, so I say ok. her comments are ranging from the staff spitting on the food to the older guy with his date looking like he was in the mexican mafia and she would look for acknowledgement from me by saying "dont you think so" and by this time was not buying into any of her shit. I had gone from wanting to bang this chick to just wanting to get away from her. she goes and take a piss. i notice the big tv has been changed to the baseball game even though the bartender said no one was watching the tv. why change the fucking channel if no one is watching, just crazy all around me here. so i ask it she can change one of the smaller tv's to the football game that is on ESPN2. she says she has no control over them, but after miss crazy comes back the bartender asks me what channel to put if on and i tell her. miss crazy starts going off on why i would do such a thing and i tell her just to relax i will do what i choose when i choose and how i choose. we order dinner. I have the prime rib and she orders ahi tuna plus an fucking blooming onion appetizer. i have already told the bartender we did not want an appetizer, but a blooming onion is not bad so what the hell. more crazy talk from this bitch. i ask for ketchup for the onion and crazy lady tells me this is a way for corporate America to control me. I tell her nobody controls me. I do what i want as i want and will not put up with anything I don't want to. She does not care for my attitude. More crazy talk ensues. she does not like the man sitting across from us. she says he looks like a cult man of some sorts and asked me what i thought of these things. again i tell her that i dont give a fuck what anybody does as long as it does not affect me. i am told that i am wrong and every one is out to get us. i am very much wanting to get away from this situation and that feeling keeps building. at one point she shows me an egg donor website and has the part of the site pulled up that tells a prospective donor that they will pay $10,000.00 for an egg. she asks me where the money is that they should have given her and i ask her if she had done this and she answers "how do i know? i mean they could have done this to me at any time and i would never know". I am just trying to figure out how to get the fuck out of here. So, i ask how that could happen and she tells me she could easily have been sedated and her body robbed of these things. I say to her I have never though about someone coming in and jacking me off and stealing my sperm in the middle of the night that this is not the way sane people think. Bloomin onion has long since been eaten and i inquire about our food. i just want to eat, leave and drop this crazy chick off at her car. the food takes another 20 minutes to arrive and i have inquired about it several more times. when it does show my prime rib looks excellent and her ahi tuna looks just like it should. she goes off and says it is not even cooked it is cold and one of the staff has obviously spit in it, so she pushes it away. Perfect for me because i ask for a box and tell the bartender that this crazy chick finds her food unacceptable and i want to leave immediately. they only charge us for the two beers i had thankfully, so i pay up and walk out not even waiting for this chick, holding the door open or anything. just a beeline to the ride where i start it and a few minutes later she gets in. i have classical music on to try to relax me and luckily she does not say a word until i get her back to her car parked at applebee's. she tells me to have a nice weekend and i tell her to drive safe. drove 78 MPH down the turnpike turned on the TV and ate my dinner alone. Up until last evening I had never met a paranoid schizophrenic before, but i am not sure I can say this anymore. Crazy, crazy and more crazy. Take care and have a good holiday weekend.... |
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