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drmgirl622 68F  
25880 posts
10/24/2016 4:34 pm

You are not a bad picker at all. As human beings we are all just so different. Each of us handle grieving so very differently. Our hearts break for many different reasons and we so want others to understand and empathize with us. Unfortunately, in most cases we grieve in silence. I believe things will work out with you and your friend..... give it some time.


1genuinedom2 63M  
51 posts
10/24/2016 5:08 pm

YOU!!!

Did nothing wrong!!! It is never wrong to grieve a parent!!!


Dreamcatcher__ 87M
7019 posts
10/24/2016 5:09 pm

I'm sorry to hear this has happened to you, but I see it occasionally.

A woman I am very close to had a best friend from High School days she broke up with after years of trying to maintain contact because the friend had kids and she didn't. My lady friend had a wide variety of interests, many of which they shared, but her former close friend became so family focused that nothing but her kids interested her any more. So now I'm closer to her friend than she is because I occasionally comment on her Facebook posts, and the only way I know her is because my friend introduced us. I've only met her once.

Same thing with another friend this woman worked with. The friend became too controlling, wanted to set her up with dates, etc., all to have a controlling interest over her life. She finally had enough and let her go.

I have known this woman since she was a college student. She is an absolute treasure. If anything she's too giving and trusting. Hell, she trusted me. If that's not trusting, I don't know what is.

The bottom line: people change. Some of them become users, takers. She and I, however, haven't changed with each other. She's married now, but I'm still the only friend, including those inside her regular circle, who sees her regularly and knows all her secrets and will never reveal them... just as she knows and will never reveal mine.

I haven't had falling outs with really close friends, but I sure have with relatives, and I can't say they were entirely to blame. So it may just be the luck of the draw.

I've lost my closest friends through neglect, distance or death. It's probably time for both of us to develop a couple of new best friends.



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