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My Blog

Welcome to my blog!

Abstained 6
Posted:May 4, 2023 4:02 am
Last Updated:May 4, 2023 5:45 am
1340 Views

Ok no new news on partners, but my abstaining is still having delicious thoughts in the absence of real play. Could it be withdrawal from intimacy of another? Whatever it is I’m glad my penis isn’t caged, and I can find relief, albeit alone.
So my fantasy of the moment is TO CRY @ THE HANDS OF ANOTHER.. I’m not the sort to cry, but my flaccid penis has stirred at the thought of a session with the only goal to make me cry. No safe word (I’m not a fan anyway) just tears stopping play. A session so intense that my emotional state overwhelms me. Video footage to watch back as I am Brocken down. My thoughts on how I imagine the session have played out in many ways, from partner to actual catalyst for the tears. Each have excited me hugely, at times making me wonder my own sanity, but each assuring me vanilla really isn’t for me.
Each have started with a stranger. Someone I don’t know. I like the thought that a stranger can go from a cold start and induce tears by the end. Someone who will walk away leaving me to figure out what the fuck went on there.
I like the idea of sensory deprivation during the setup. My penis again hardening at the thought that I’m hooded without a chance to build a full picture of the Dom who will break me. Heavy chains to restrict my movement for the first scenario, and then my sight enabled to enhance the butterflies in my stomach at the sight of my the instrument to inflict pain.
I think about my past sessions. Real. Possible.. then in my mind they are enhanced. Needles replaced by nails. Sessions from hrs to days.
To be continued…….
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Last nights naughty little dream
Posted:Apr 3, 2023 1:57 am
Last Updated:Mar 28, 2024 5:7 am
1897 Views

If only…….

It started with coffee. A new sir had selected one of my chastity devices, and asked me to bring it. 10 mins in and my penis was locked in a tiny cage, and I was handing over the keys. An assurance I would meet sir the following week (so many men discussed but never showed, at least my locked manhood would ensure a show)
A week later I pulled into the drive of a cottage in a remote location in wales. A week of being locked had been hard, and now I was hoping the wait was worth it.
Sir took me to the boot room, and asked me to remove my clothes. Smiling he put a hand on my chest and said I’m looking forward to this. I gave him my leather hood he had selected from my collection. My favourite. As he pulled it over my head I inhaled my scent of past sessions. Fear, excitement and sweat. The hood takes time to secure. Leather strips pushed through many eyelets, then crisscrossed from left to right until pulled together tightly around my head. My caged penis tries to stiffen as the leather becomes my second skin.
The mask has leather patches with poppers to attach to the mask. Eyes and mouth can be covered or open. For this weekend, sir decided to deprive me of sight. As the last popper was pressed into place, my sight was removed and I became aware of male voices from another room.
Around my neck sir secured a large wooden fiddle, my wrists attached the other end. Another uncomfortable device I would not be release from for the duration of the weekend.
Pushed to my knees, sir moved my head to his crotch area. He unbuttoned his jeans filling my nostrils with the powerful scent of his manhood. I opened my mouth wide to take his hard penis into my mouth. Unable to use my hands to improve my technique, I was forced to work harder with my mouth and tongue. He felt large and powerful as I focused on pleasing sir. He controlled when I could take air, and when he desired he pushed deep to my throat causing much saliva over the outer part of my leather mask. Eventually I brought him to climax and felt his warm cum slip down my throat. Sir was please and helped me to my feet explaining my weekend in store ~ his friends, remaining bound, no clothes or sight. X
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Abstained 5
Posted:Mar 16, 2023 9:43 am
Last Updated:Mar 16, 2023 10:00 am
2347 Views

I’m not sure if I should change the title. Maybe to partially abstained?
True to this years challenge no penis penetration, but the start of a great oral adventure. Her accent was very Germanic, her English considerably better than my German. Her hips ass and thighs out of proportion to the rest of her body. My penis grew hard against my jeans. We met Tuesday in a bar, reluctant to be bound by a stranger without so much as a hello, we drank and chatted the night away.
By wed morning she wanted more, by afternoon I dressed her in a large leather collar, tightly pulled around her neck, with each of the 3 buckles used to join the hoop restricting movement of her head. Her wrists cuffed behind her back, and a belt used to strap the upper parts of her arms, forcing out her small chest and creating an aesthetically pleasing view of her upper back and shoulders.
After securing her ankles (more difficult due to bed design) I took time to admire her shapely thighs. Like a soft pillow to rest my head as I worked my tongue between her lips. The first taste of her as I probe a little deeper, her dampness urged on with the anticipation.
I complement my tongue with fingers. Rubbing, inserting. My mouth sometimes biting sucking or blowing. She responds well. Her collar preventing any sight of my actions. Her restraints being tested as her excitement builds.
My own penis hard, wanting to join the party, but I won’t allow it. I move to bite her inner thighs, a reminder when I’m gone. The smooth softness of her skin a contrast to other lovers. The doughy flesh a contrast to the upper part of her body.
She was quick to cum. Too quick, apologising for not allowing me to maximise the damp slippery hole I had worked hard to create. I smiled to myself, knowing now is the time to leave. Temptation and the moral duty to work on my aching penis might be too much for my new challenge. I release her and leave.
X
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Abstained 4
Posted:Mar 6, 2023 12:05 am
Last Updated:Mar 28, 2024 5:7 am
1908 Views

Ghosted. In my preparations to re enter the world of physical interaction, I have been messaging an interesting chap about a meet. I explained my last 12 month challenge and some ideas about play. Bemused, he sounded interested. 10years plus my senior, he wanted me in specific ladies clothes I was to arrange. His other likes included water sports, electricity all mixed in with heavy bondage. Excluding the bondage I have no experience of his kink, but after some research I figured as long as the piss was separated from the electricity what could go wrong? We were to meet for the first time in person for a coffee on Sat, and as requested had brought the clothes he had asked me to buy in a bag.
I rocked gently in my chair, my largest of my 3 plugs working it’s magic inside me. The time we had arranged came and went. Every time the door to the coffee shop opened my eyes looked up, but none resembling the photo appeared. Then I called, only to learn he had blocked me. I guess he really liked taking the piss. 😂
Still as one door closes another opens. A German business women is coming to London week of the 13th. A little past my 12 months abstinence, but with a lust for oral, bondage and bruising, with an interesting sizeable ass, thighs and hips, it could be fun. Sure I’ll be the dominant one, but I’m already planning the number of bites on her spread wide milky thighs. Let’s see if this one makes the distance……. X
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Abstained 3
Posted:Feb 28, 2023 1:52 am
Last Updated:Apr 23, 2023 11:41 pm
1737 Views
A fine but distracting start to Tuesday. A weekend away with friends, a frustrating buildup as I socialise my way around a new city, and then the hangover of work today.
Hungry to build on my frustrations of the long weekend, I’ve inserted my mid size plug, and deliciously tight nipple clamps under a tight white T-shirt. Just for fun and the delightful sound, I’ve wrapped the steel cuffs of my ankle cuffs around my ankles, to the ratchet level that makes the slightest movement of the foot an ordeal! My limited work camera field of vision and loose work shirt allows me to go about my vanilla duties, whilst a nice repositioning in my seat or tug on my nipple clamp linking chain pushes up my pulse code to that of a good run.
A quick read of a blog by 98percentlesbian and her oral only experiences in Oxford (nice blog) has sent my mind racing and penis hardening. Maybe my next 12 months challenge should be an oral only one. 2 years of no penetration, but learning to become better at giving to anyone enjoying such attention. Ive always enjoyed the taste and small of an excited partner. The variety of male and female different shapes and sizes. It could work? Time for a little more rocking in my chair. X
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Abstained 2
Posted:Feb 21, 2023 7:13 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2023 11:27 pm
1903 Views

For the most part I’ve enjoyed it. Nights out are less about hunting prospective partners, and more about engaging in conversation. If anything if I was looking for sex, not going out on the pretence of finding it, I now believe helps!
Of course with our kink a night into town is unlikely to unearth a suitable partner. Not having those forays into the vanilla world drove my kink urge to new levels. Your photos and short videos have helped - thank you (just because I’m not fucking another, doesn’t mean I’m not helping myself )
I have loved sorting through my kit bags and playing alone. A mid sized plug whilst out for dinner. Brutal nipple clamps rubbing and wriggling around on a long walk can be quite intense. As I sit and write this, I have finally managed to screw in the full way the last spike into by ball stretcher. A prolonged stint of its heavy weight and sharp spikes is quite nice sat alone on a Tuesday afternoon. X
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Abstained
Posted:Feb 20, 2023 12:47 am
Last Updated:Feb 27, 2023 2:04 am
1761 Views

On March 11 it will be 12 months since my last sexual encounter with another. Im not locked in chastity, I just thought I’d give it a go. I hope to write a little of my experiences here. X
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Personality behind the mask
Posted:Oct 6, 2014 11:14 am
Last Updated:Mar 2, 2022 7:36 am
6607 Views

So after a 3 hrs train trip back from Paris today, I pondered the strangeness of our fetish. If personality counts, how do you demonstrate it with a bloody big gag in your mouth, or holding a deep meaning conversation when your fisting another. I concluded in the vanilla world beauty and personality might be the worm that catches the bait, but it’s much more satisfying getting close to a partner through many hrs of intense play than a quick 20min group at the back of a club. Maybe I should get some more photos done. Any thoughts, or offers of help?
1 comment
Bloody hot on the Amasterdam Cannels tonight
Posted:Sep 18, 2014 11:07 am
Last Updated:Oct 6, 2014 10:54 am
8202 Views

For Sep its hot. Perfect for sweaty layers of PVC and leather. Yum. However pissed off with the number of mosquitos! when will the buggers die for the winter?
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