Let’s talk about aftercare.
I’m not talking about sex, or a long bath, or lying silently, skin to skin with your partner as you float back into yourself.
Don’t get me wrong, I love that kind of aftercare. But what I want to talk about now is the physical. Better yet, the medical side. I want to talk about what to do for your body to help it heal and recover so that you can play again ‒ happily and healthily.
How many times, for those submissives reading this, have you come out of a great session, your ass red from a really good spanking, the skin on your back tight and hot from flogging, muscles sore from kneeling for what felt like forever, and then had to go to work the next day? Or to a family dinner where you really did not want to let on to mom what it is you do for fun?
For dominants, how many times have you looked at the marks you left on your submissive and tried to figure out how to help hide those? How many times have you wanted to pull your sub close and hold them whenever you see them try to sit down and then wince in pain?
And how many times have you wanted to play again, but had to take it easy because the damage from the last scene hadn’t healed up yet?
If you’ve ever been in either of those roles, or think you might be, keep reading. I’m going to share with you the contents of my aftercare med kit.
First, a disclaimer. I am not a medical professional. The info I’m sharing with you is information I’ve gathered over the years, from friends, from colleagues, from medical professionals I’ve adroitly questioned while trying not to tell them why I’m asking these things, and from obsessively reading books and websites about healing.
Also, I’m a professional submissive. I am an expert on needing to heal quickly and hide marks. For me, it’s a matter of making rent.
That said, for this article I’m focusing on the kinds of injuries that come up most frequently. Bruising, rope burn, sore muscles, and small cuts. I’m not going into serious burns, piercings, scarification, or branding. I would also like to note that while most of the bruising I talk about is on the ass, the treatments I use work regardless of location.
The contents of my aftercare med kit:
1. Ice
Ice, ice, ice!
I know you’ve heard this one before, but it really does bear repeating. We keep several ice packs in the freezer at the Gates (the dungeon where I work).
I put an ice pack on immediately after a session that I think will bruise, and replace it with another when it cools. I’ve heard the “15 minutes on, 15 minutes off” theory, but I don’t buy it. I apply ice constantly during the first 12 hours, and then as often as I can until 48 hours are up. (Remember, you can use ice any time in the first 48 hours to prevent inflammation).
The reason it works so well is pretty complex when you get down to it. I know -- I asked my doctor and came away with five pages of notes. To sum it up, the whole inflammation process is a cascade that takes days to come into full effect ‒ this is why injuries hurt more three or four days after you get them than they do initially. Traumatized cells essentially send out an invitation to your white blood cells saying, “Hey, guys! There’s a party over here, and we’re not sure, but there may be beer.” Well, not beer but bacteria, but close enough. When the white blood cells come running, they don’t know if there’s an actual cut with bacteria or if it’s just a bruise.
These days we’ve got antibiotics to handle bacteria. And when the skin isn’t even broken, inflammation is even less useful.
Putting an ice pack on short-circuits the whole cascade.
2. Bromelain
After ice, this one is probably my best weapon.
One Thursday I night, I found myself with a massive bruise blossoming along the curve of my left ass cheek. Saturday night was going to be the first night I spent with the new guy I was dating, and I really didn’t want to have that bruise in place the first time he saw me naked. So I broke out the Bromelain.
I took two 500 mg tablets every three hours all of Friday and Saturday, and the bruise was so faint that night, my date didn’t even notice it, even though he gave the area a pretty thorough inspection.
This one is an enzyme found in pineapples that helps with inflammation and cleans up the broken hemoglobin that gives us such lovely purples and reds under the skin when we bruise. It also does amazingly well at getting rid of the red marks from acne.
For those of us who kneel often, it’s also got another lovely trait of helping with the sort of inflammation that causes joint pain and arthritis.
It’s a bit harder to come by than ice, but you can find it at any health food store.
3. Anti-inflammatories
Take two Advil and call me in the morning. Don’t take aspirin, though. That would be bad.
Both help with inflammation, but both can increase blood flow. If you have a cut, or a massive bruise, you really don’t want to increase blood flow. Advil, or ibuprofen, is usually all right, but steer clear of aspirin.
Ibuprofen is ideal for those times when your skin is red and hot, and feel stretched tight, but there aren’t any actual bruises showing up. Also good for minor bruising, because it really does help with the inflammation.
These also help minimize pain, which is both good and bad. It allows you to sit down without wincing, which is good for family dinners and day jobs, but it also makes it easier to forget that you need to be gentle with yourself.
If, however, you really do want to get rid of the pain, I’d recommend acetaminophen. Tylenol is a good bet. It won’t touch the inflammation, won’t increase bleeding, but will help with the pain. And you can combine it with ibuprofen without any problems.
4. Arnica and Calendula
These are two great remedies for aches, rope burn, and minor abrasions. I combine them here because I combine them when I use them, too.
Calendula is said to have mild anti-microbial properties, and Arnica is good for inflammation. I get them combined in a cream called Traumeel, which works wonderfully for rope burns and minor abrasions. My skin feels less irritated after I apply the cream.
It’s a bit expensive, and you can find both separately in individual creams. But hey, I got hooked on a free sample.
5. Soap and Warm Water
When it comes to cuts, you really can’t beat soap and water. Although, as with many things, it’s how you use them that counts. You scrub.
Now, I’m assuming that you play safely and you keep any sharp-edged instruments surgical-level clean. I’m also assuming you know what you’re doing when it comes to cutting. I never do edge play at work; I only do edge play in my personal life with one dom, who I trust to know what he’s doing. And, in his hands, I love it.
Afterwards, I wash every cut with soap and water. The water doesn’t actually need to be warm ‒ I just like it better that way, and it does increase blood flow in the area. The part I don’t like, but that’s absolutely necessary, is the scrubbing. You want to get every bit of foreign material out of your body. Because I tend to stick with fairly shallow cuts, I can usually get away with just using a wash cloth to scrub ‒ and a good friend to do the scrubbing even while I’m squirming and whining (hint: this is a great way for a good dom to take care of their sub).
If the cut is deeper, we get into brush territory. A nail brush or face brush works: the bristles go deeper. This hurts, but then, so did the cutting.
I will note that I tend not to use alcohol, although I know it’s popular. It’s not necessary. Even the soap isn’t necessary. The scrubbing action is key.
6. Superglue
Seriously, I can’t imagine living without superglue. I should note that in the US only medical-grade superglue is approved for use on wounds. I don’t buy that stuff because it’s too expensive and I’ve been using regular superglue all my life. You want the tube, not the pens, because it’s a lot easier to apply.
You only want to use superglue on shallow wounds (that you have thoroughly scrubbed) where there’s no risk of sealing foreign bacteria deep into the cut. Surface bacteria gets caught in the superglue and can’t really go anywhere or do anything. Press the edges of the cut together and then apply the superglue on top of it.
Superglue also creates a scab for you, which is exactly what you want. It keeps bad stuff out and allows your body time to heal.
There are, of course, other things I keep in my med kit. Like band-aids and ace wraps, and q-tips and Neosporin. But the real tools that make my job doable and help me recover quickly are the ones I’ve already given you.
Take care of yourself, or of your submissive. You can make this medical side of aftercare a part of your regular routine; in fact, I highly recommend it. I can’t tell you how close I feel to my boyfriend when he puts a bandage on me or hands me a fresh ice pack. Or reminds me to take my Bromelain.
After all, good aftercare is one of the best ways to get (and keep) a good playmate.
