So I looked around during my first day and got the feel of the place. I decided to type more here now. I a very proud woman. I grew up in a hispanic/white household. I know to respect my elders and the like. But I also respect the family unit. I've always known I was different from girls growing up. At nine I knew what sex was and had kissed my first girl also. At thirteen my virginity was taken, but even then I felt I was off and lost. I knew I thought about sex more than other girls my age then. At sixteen I found my first bdsm story to read online and found myself wishing I was the slave in the story. It was odd and awkward. I had no one to turn to in all honesty. My family are catholics and god forbid (excuse the pun) they found out.
As years went on I was eighteen and dating a very dominating guy I went to school with. He was the first to ever collar me and make me crawl on my hands and knees. Unfortunately he hurt me, leaving me as a single mother. It was tough to overcome. I felt more lost in my life than ever before. I didn't know what to do. I felt a peice of me gone without his strict words in bed and such.
These days I work two jobs and raise my lovely three year-old son, who is the light of my life and helped me overcome my loniness, most of it anyway.
I you can see now I control everything in my life. It is exhausting. I feel I am too young to be doing all of this. I wish to be cared for. Nutured in a sense. I realize I am a single mother, but I feel I have a better understanding of life than anyone else my age. I'm confident in myself and in what I am capable of. I work hard and enjoy it. My motto is..Always try your best in what you do, for if you put your best into all, you will find yourself succeeding more than you know.
Gods I feel like I'm babbling on a little -laughs softly- But I feel anyone needing to know me should read carefully. Try to understand the trials I've been through so quickly in my young life. I'm very mature for my age because of my life experiences.
I do have views on how I wish to be a slave for someone. I believe in equality when outside the home and bedroom. I understand who I belong to and would respect it. But respect and love is required. To respect and protect your woman is how I was taught in my household. In the bedroom is a different matter. That is a private world I would have with my master. But as I said, outside I would be the perfect housewife in a sense. Warm, loving, outgoing and maturnal. I'm a kind person, but I do tend to have a dominate personality when it comes to defending my beliefs or even defending family and friends. If you cannot grasp any of what I've said, then honestly we would not work. I require love and tenderness, not just the pain my craves at times.
Now I am heavily into bondage and love a strong master. I love being told what to do and to be called degrading names and the like. But in public, my master and I would be a respectable couple. Like those nice people you would never imagine being into darker fantasies.
-smiles sheepishly- I hope I did not go on too much and I pray this will give you a better insight on me.
[if254 1]
My Ideal Person:
A skilled Master who will work with me to help me discover my true submissive within. I'm also looking for a Master to remain with and dedicate myself to.
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