I've been blessed to find a dominant. It's not a normal relationship, I am far from normal. I am the collared female het sub of a gay male dominant. Ours is a service relationship, at least it is now. I am looking forward to seeing where it goes. When Ed asked me to become his collared submissive, I asked one question. Will I still be allowed to look for a her relationship. He immediately said yes. He's poly and I am too. How this other relationship will affect ours is unknown. Have to find him first.
But why Ed asked me to become his submissive was not because who I tried to be, but who I was. I went out of my way to make sure others got what they needed in their relationship with Ed and Ed got what he needed too. It was being helpful and without jealousy. It was being myself. I am proud of belonging to Ed. I am getting used to being protected, accepted, cared for, and more. Ed doesn't take advantage of my service and he refuses to allow others to take advantage of me. It will take a while to get used to. But I feel comfortable with him. I ask questions. I give my opinions. And I'm happy.
Here's the rest of my profile:
I am starting my profile over from scratch. I am a female, 49, educated, intelligent, and I have a challenging job I love. I also have 3 kids, one out of the house and 2 live with me. For some this is a hard limit so if it is for you, I suggest looking else where. I am unique in the world of subs. I know, many say the same thing. But it will take a special dominant to tackle the task of owning me since I am just as special as they are.
How am I special? I am a certified whip slut. I have done scenes with 2 people bull whipping me and as many as 9 dominants single tailing me. Typically it is 2-4 using whips on me at the same time. That doesn't really make me that special though. The fact I make my own whips and repair whips not to mention know how to crack whips, does make me special. I do enjoy a good flogging and other edge play. I tend to be attracted to the more advanced play than most.
Although I don't want to love easily, I do. I try to protect my heart and mind, but I tend to lose the battle. Knowing that, I wait for problems to arise to see who stays around and who runs at the first sign of bumps in the relationship. I am extremely trusting which tends to be more of a liability than an asset. I think the best of people until I am shown otherwise. There's good and bad in all of us, I tend to focus only on the good. I wear my heart on my sleeve ; my eyes shine with the naked truth of my feelings and emotions. A good reason to keep my eyes demurely lowered!
Some more about me is I am poly. But I don't want to be lost in a poly household. I want to feel an equal to the others in the family, not just someone who is thought about accidentally from time to time. I always dreamed of having a poly where there are separate houses or one huge house, the subs getting along fine, any children are raised by all the adults in a loving and caring atmosphere. I could easily have that here. I have 24 acres with more dreams and ideas than I can put on paper. I would like to find someone that could share that life with me.
Although my profile says I am open to relocating, it is on a very limited basis. I love where I live, where I work, and what I do. To me this is as close to paradise as I think I will get. But there is a door that could open if I find the right person for me. For someone just as special as me, I would entertain the possibility of relocating.
Some other things about me...I love home renovation although I tend to bounce between projects and take them slow. Some call that a flaw but I see it more as me not knowing where I want to take a project and go to another until I have a set plan and the time to complete it not to mention the energy and money required. I love to play the bagpipes. I am getting into spinning poi and other fire toys. I love to read and do crafts. I've made 90% of my toys myself. I am very creative and sadistic! I am a very happy person for the most part and I laugh a lot. No, I mean A LOT! I have had people ask if I've ever been in a bad mood. I tend to take life in stride and not get upset about what normally sets people off. I don't see how getting upset achieves anything, the problem is still there. Hence , I look for possible solutions rather than wasting time and energy going off the deep end.
As for my house hold, I have 5 horses, 4 dogs, 4 cats, fish, and a ferret. I have 2 of my own kids living with me plus 3 that aren't mine. They are friends of my middle child that needed a home, their parents didn't care about them anymore. I don't plan to allow these kids to remain here for the rest of their lives. I look forward to when I have a kid free home. But until then, I will offer them a safe haven where they can find a place to sleep, some food to eat, and acceptance.
I apologize if I've rambled but to decide to contact a person to see if there is a possible future, you need to learn something about a person in their profile. I have read profiles where it's basically about sex. They tell little else about themselves. I will say now that sex is icing on the cake but the relationship comes first. I haven't had sex in over 2 1/2 years and I don't plan to start now. I also don't play casually since I rarely use safe words.
I could go on more but I should keep some mystery about myself. If you've gotten this far, congratulations! If you feel some connection to my words, feel free to email me. If you want to learn more about me, try reading my blog. Or you could contact me too. There is that. Oh, did I mention I have a great sense of humor?
ADDED: Just for clarification I am NOT looking for sex. In fact, I haven't had sex in over 2 1/2 years. It's not important to me. I'm not looking to change my status so don't see me as a challenge. I'm not into humiliation or role playing. I don't like yellow showers or medical play. If your interest lay in these areas, I'm not the sub for you. I wish you luck in finding one who matches your interests.
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My Ideal Person:
Someone that has a stronger personality than mine. One that has training, knows what they are doing, what they want,and knows where they are sending me. A dominant has the patience of the ages, the wisdom to guide me, and a love of life to match mine. He should be willing to live and learn yet can balance that with sane judgment. I don't expect a Dom to be perfect. We are ,after all, only human. And poly!
Some of the needs I have in a relationship are a home where I can raise my kids and when they are gone, a home they can come to visit. I need affection , intelligence, humor, and on a more selfish nature, someone proficient with whips. I am a whip slut after all. Someone that can help me grow but also admits I help him grow too.
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